perfectly imperfect.

lately i've been wondering a lot about why or how people can look at a person, and instantly judge them. i'm not going to lie to you guys, i have certainly done my fair share of hating on people because i thought they maybe weren't necessarily the most attractive, or the best dressed, or the nicest, or the smartest... you name it, i've probably talked about it, and you probably have too. said something about it, or thought it in your head. don't deny it. you have, everybody does, because that's how humans are. we are judgemental creatures, and it's our nature to make ourselves feel better by comparing ourselves to others. lately though, i've actually really thought a lot about how a person can take just one quick glance at someone, and decide whether they're worth talking to or getting to know. for example, a guy will like a girl, but the girl won't even give the guy the time of day because he doesn't have chisled abs, or bulging biceps. or maybe he just really isn't all that attractive. same thing goes for guys with girls. in my experience, most (NOT ALL) guys seem to gravitate towards the girls that wear skin tight clothes and push up bras to show off their otherwise almost non-existent boobs. i mean honestly, how often do you see a guy saying "damn... that girl has nice big EYES". it just doesn't happen. also, another thing i don't understand... is why people who are not like "you" are automatically "weird". NEWSFLASH. everyone is different in their own way, whether they like to go out and party all the time, or they get their kicks by sitting at home on a friday night watching movies by themselves. whether they like to dress in all black, or they wear ONLY what they can find on a hollister shelf or rack. (and in case you didn't notice... those sentences rhymed, unintentionally. i earned my gold star for the day. heck YESSSSSS.) maybe i'm really the only person i know of that doesn't judge people by what they look like. i'm not going to deny somebody the opportunity they deserve to be my friend just because they're fat, or ugly, or poorly dressed, or mentally or physically disabled. it absolutely INFURIATES me when i hear of someone telling me that a certain person isn't the kind of person i should start liking because they're not what i need in a boyfriend, or a friend or whatever. i can't even explain how much it angers me. especially when it is someone i consider myself to be close with. it is always disappointing when you find out that your closest friends or family members are judging your friends. i guess i don't anymore because i realized that it really doesn't matter. AT ALL. just because you're pretty or hot doesn't mean i want to be your friend. getting to know people is my favorite thing to do, i just love learning about other people and the way they think and what they think of certain things. i honestly couldn't care less how a person looks, or what they do in their free time, or if they're rich or poor, or smart or stupid or whatever. it just kills me to think that that's all that matters to some people... i'll take inner beauty over outer ANY DAY. and i would hope that all my friends are that way too. so this post is probably pretty "ranty" and redundant. i probably repeated myself a bajillion and two times, but did i get my point across? good. don't ever forget that whoever you are, boy or girl, white, black, asian, hispanic, fat, skinny, gorgeous, ugly, emo, preppy, whatever you are, you are beautiful just the way you are, and you are worth more than you will ever know. RANT=OVER. until next time... peace out. :)

boys lie and kind of stink.

it's official! i move into my apartment in less than a month! i'm so excited, if i could move there sooner i would. not necessarily to get away from waseca, but i'm just really eager to start getting adjusted to living on my own. sorry mom, i know you don't want me to leave. haha. well... i just recently decided something that hopefully will be beneficial to me in the long run. and that is: i am swearing off of guys. like, i do not intend to have any kind of relationship or "things" with any guys for a while. i have come to realize that they really only just seem to cause drama, and that is NOT something that i need in my first year of college. it's gonna be stressful enough without the extra help of some guy. since this is my blog, i am choosing to go off on a little rant for like the next 30 seconds. (depending on how fast you are able to read it). basically, i'm extremely uninterested in having a relationship with anyone. my last "relationship" meant nothing to me. it was so pointless, i think i just wanted to see what it was like to be in one. call me a bitch for doing it but i don't really care. :) and nooooow, when i kinda actually liked a guy... well let's just say that didn't work out. i spent a good eighteen years of my life without anyone, i think i can last a while longer without dating anyone. i think i can honestly say i am, for the most part, genuinely happy with where i'm at in life right now. i've got amazing family and friends, and that's all i need. so when i start school, i'm not saying i'm not going to be open to finding any guys worthy of dating. i'm just saying that i'm not going to be looking. i only need guy friends right now, nothing more. so there you go! my little rant. i hope you enjoyed reading it. well until next time. peace.

i wish i could read minds.

so i decided it might be a good idea to not wait like a month in between blog posts again... so i waited a day! woohoo! anyway... i guess this blog is going to be more of a rant than anything so if you don't like it, you suck! just kidding. :) anyway... it's not about anything specific necessarily. just in general: but have you ever had that moment where you think about something that happened WAAAAAY more than necessary?? i do. i do it all the dang time. i tend to over analyze certain situations, and not without good reason, mind you. i just sometimes think well why did this person do this? why'd they say that? did they mean what they said or are they just saying it just for the sake of saying something? sometimes things that happen mean more to me than i think they do for the other person and it's dumb, yo. but, such is life. in the meantime, i am just going to keep wandering. aimlessly, most likely trying to figure it all out. and that's all part of the great adventure is it not? we'll see what happens and if it's worth documenting. you'll know too. thanks for reading my somewhat-rant. until next time... peace.

your voice, was the soundtrack of my summer...

wow, it's been such a long time since i've made a new blog... i'd feel worse if i knew people were actually reading it. ha! well anyways, not too much has happened since my last blog post. i graduated high school, had my college orientation, signed up for classes, and continue to buy things for my apartment! (my total money spent is pretty damn close to 400 dollars just since summer started. i'll be a broke college student before i know it! fffffffuuuuuuuu-... other than that, i haven't really been up to much! such is the life of boring little old me. basically my summer consists of babysitting two girls for like eight or nine hours a day, everyday. it gets old but it's money... which i proceed to spend on my apartment. *sigh* on a side note, I'M SO HACKIN' EXCITED TO MOVE OUT:) today's the 16th, so that means i'll be moving out in just a little over a month. hard to believe that i'll be living on my own in just a short amount of time! i guess i should really find a job then, huh... crap. i'll be looking but for now i'm just going to enjoy what's left of my summer, which really isn't that much. i've thoroughly enjoyed most of my summer though, i can honestly say. of course some things that i have done i look back and i'm like WHYYYY did i do that... but everything happens for a reason? i'm still trying to figure out that reason... i  can be so friggin' stupid sometimes. i swear. well anyhow, i've met a lot of interesting people since i've been out of school, which only makes me more excited to meet people at college! (and by people i mean guys... preferably ones that play football or wrestle... and that like country music). totally kidding! (not really). well...........this blog is pretty random. and not really all that entertaining to read! sorry, i'll come up with something better soon. until then, peace out friends.